MDMA relationship therapy: A promising new approach to couples counseling

A person having a therapy session

Traditional therapy can help, but many couples are looking for a new option: MDMA relationship therapy. This combines regulated doses of MDMA, a psychedelic drug known as “ecstasy” or “Molly,” with talk therapy. This article will explore this therapy’s benefits and potential drawbacks and discuss how to find an MDMA therapist.

What is MDMA

MDMA is a synthetic drug that alters mood and perception. It is commonly known as ecstasy (tablet form), and molly or mandy (crystal form) and is often used as a recreational drug at parties and raves. However, it also has a history of being used as a therapeutic tool to enhance empathy, trust, and communication in couples. In fact, MDMA was first developed by a German pharmaceutical company called Merck in 1912 as a parent compound to synthesize medications that control bleeding. Some psychiatrists used MDMA as a psychotherapeutic catalyst in the 1970s and 1980s before it was banned in the United States in 1985.

MDMA has gained renewed interest as a promising treatment for post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and other mental health conditions. Clinical trials and several studies have shown that MDMA and talk therapy can relieve those suffering from PTSD and mental health others. It does this by reducing fear and anxiety and facilitating emotional processing.

What is MDMA relationship therapy?

MDMA relationship therapy involves using MDMA to facilitate couples counseling sessions. Couples who have tried MDMA relationship therapy report that it helps them lower their defenses, open up, and discuss their feelings more freely; feel more empathy and closeness with their partners; and even have better sex. 

However, using MDMA for relationship issues is not without risks. MDMA is an illegal drug that can have serious side effects, such as increased blood pressure, heart rate, body temperature, dehydration, nausea, jaw clenching, and muscle tension. It can also cause psychological effects like anxiety, paranoia, depression, and confusion. Moreover, there is very little research on couples who use MDMA together for therapy, making it difficult to point to scientific evidence of the successes this therapeutic process brings.

The science of MDMA relationship therapy

MDMA, also known as the “love drug,” is a synthetic substance that can alter mood and perception. It boosts the levels of brain chemicals that are linked to happiness, empathy, and connection. It also affects hormones that influence sexual arousal and trust. These effects can make MDMA a powerful tool for couples therapy, especially for those who struggle with PTSD and other mental health issues.

PTSD is a condition that occurs after experiencing a traumatic event. It can cause nightmares, flashbacks, anxiety, and depression. It can also affect the quality of romantic relationships, making it hard to communicate and bond with one’s partner. MDMA-assisted therapy can help couples overcome these challenges and have more opportunities to improve their relationship.

In a study published in the Journal of Psychopharmacology in 2018, researchers examined the effects of MDMA-assisted therapy on couples with PTSD. The study involved 103 participants who had PTSD and were in a committed relationship. They received MDMA-assisted therapy with their partner present and reported significant improvements in their relationship satisfaction and communication after the treatment. The researchers concluded that MDMA-assisted therapy can enhance the emotional connection between couples and help them heal from trauma.

Benefits of MDMA relationship therapy

MDMA relationship therapy can help couples overcome anxiety, fear, and defensiveness that can make communicating difficult. MDMA during therapeutic sessions can help couples feel more relaxed and open, which can lead to facilitating more honest and productive conversations. It can also help couples work through trust, intimacy, and emotional connection issues.

Another benefit of MDMA relationship therapy is that it can produce lasting changes in the brain that promote emotional healing and resilience. According to one study, MDMA can increase the activity of the prefrontal cortex, which is responsible for regulating emotions and social behavior. This can lead to improvements in emotional regulation and social functioning.

However, it is important to note that MDMA-assisted cognitive processing therapy is not a magic bullet that can fix any relationship problem. It requires careful preparation, guidance, and integration by trained therapists who can help couples use the drug safely and effectively. Some couples may experience adverse effects from MDMA, such as anxiety, paranoia, depression, or physical discomfort. Therefore, MDMA-assisted couples therapy is unsuitable for everyone and should be done cautiously and respectfully.

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Structure of therapy: How MDMA-Assisted couples therapy works

MDMA-assisted couples therapy combines MDMA with cognitive-behavioral conjoint therapy (CBCT), a couples therapy specifically tailored to trauma healing. CBCT involves teaching couples skills to cope with trauma-related symptoms, improve communication and problem-solving, enhance emotional and physical intimacy, and support each other during one member’s recovery. CBCT has significantly improved PTSD symptoms, trauma-related cognitions, and relationship functioning1

However, well-being and CBCT in relationships can also be challenging for some couples, especially those with difficulty expressing emotions, trusting their partners, or feeling safe and connected in intimate relationships. This is where MDMA can help. MDMA enhances empathy, trust, and compassion by increasing the release of neurotransmitters such as serotonin, dopamine, and oxytocin in the brain2. MDMA also reduces the activity of the amygdala, a part of the brain that regulates fear and anger, and increases the prefrontal cortex, a part of the brain involved in rational thinking and self-awareness3.

By adding MDMA to CBCT, couples can experience heightened emotional openness, feelings of interpersonal connection, and psychological flexibility, which researchers say can facilitate the therapeutic process and lead to deeper and more lasting changes. MDMA-assisted couples therapy involves three distinct phases: preparation, the acute MDMA experience, and integration.

  • Preparation: In this phase, couples set their intentions for the therapy, learn about the effects and risks of MDMA, and learn how to support each other during the session. They also practice some skills and exercises that they will use during the session, such as mindful breathing, active listening, and expressing gratitude. The preparation phase helps couples build trust and rapport with the therapists and each other. It also helps them prepare for any challenges or difficulties during the session.
  • The acute MDMA experience: In this phase, couples take a measured dose of MDMA (usually between 75 and 125 mg) under the guidance of trained therapists in a comfortable and safe setting. The session lasts about six to eight hours, during which couples engage in structured and unstructured conversations, exercises, and activities to explore their feelings, needs, and challenges. The therapists provide minimal intervention but offer support and guidance when needed. This phase aims to help couples access and process their emotions, communicate more effectively and authentically, empathize with each other’s perspectives, resolve conflicts and misunderstandings, enhance intimacy and bonding, and strengthen their relationship.
  • Integration: In this phase, couples reflect on their insights and experiences from the session, process their emotions and reactions, and plan to apply what they learned to their daily lives. They also receive feedback and support from the therapists, who help them identify any challenges or barriers to change and any resources or strategies to overcome them. The integration phase helps couples consolidate their learning and growth and maintain positive changes.

How to find an MDMA therapist: Setting, structure, and safety

If you’re interested in trying MDMA relationship therapy, you’ll need to find a qualified therapist trained in this approach to psychotherapy.

The Multidisciplinary Association for Psychedelic Studies (MAPS) is a nonprofit research and educational organization working to develop MDMA-assisted therapy for PTSD and other conditions. They offer a directory of MDMA-assisted therapy providers trained and licensed to provide this type of therapy in certain countries or regions.

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Final thought

MDMA relationship therapy is a promising new approach to couples counseling that has the potential to help couples overcome difficult emotional issues and enhance their connection. While more research is needed to understand this approach couple therapy’s benefits and risks fully, initial studies suggest that it can be effective in improving relationship satisfaction and communication for couples with or without PSTD. If you’re interested in exploring MDMA relationship or couple therapy together, be sure to find a qualified therapist who can guide you through the process in a safe and legal manner.

It’s important to keep in mind that MDMA-assisted therapy is not a cure-all for relationship problems. It’s a tool that can help couples work through difficult emotional issues and facilitate deeper communication and connection by enhancing the release of neurotransmitters and hormones that affect mood, empathy, and trust. It’s also important to note that MDMA is an illegal drug that can have serious side effects when used improperly. It should only be used under the supervision of a trained therapist with MDMA-assisted therapy experience and in a comfortable and safe setting.

In conclusion, MDMA relationship therapy is a promising new approach to couples counseling that has shown positive results in initial studies. While more research is needed to understand its benefits and risks fully, couples who are struggling with emotional issues or difficulty communicating may find it helpful to explore MDMA-assisted therapy with a qualified therapist. Remember always to prioritize safety and legality when seeking any form of psychotherapy or therapy, and work with a trained professional who can guide you through the process with care and respect.

Eric Van Buskirk